Myth 10: Habits and patterns are difficult to change. You have to talk a lot to have a god relationship. We are each others best coaching
Key to deconstruction
Shut up and let your body do the talking
Keep a watchful eye out so you don’t step into the trappings of a ‘therapeutic relationship’. Also, women might step into a mothering role and men into a fatherfigure. Don’t go there! Or take a step back. The True Lover in you knows better. Give that knowing it’s rightful place. No matter how scary (or new) it may be.
By having an excellent connection to yourself, your own body and having lot’s of (physical) contact with the other person, you can experience more directly what really is going on and what is needed, instead of thinking about what is needed.
Our body’s are the compass that you can learn to rely upon.
The body intelligence is more complex and fine tuned than talking can ever hope to achieve (and I’m not talking lust) The danger of talking too much is that you overanalyze and get stuck in your head with all sorts of stories and drama which are far less relevant than you thing. This road leads away from your feelings and your ‘gutfeelings’…
Talk less and ‘sense’ more, and you will know much more about where you and the other stand with each other.
Clean up your own internal mess. Don’t bring everything into your relationship incessantly. It’s killing.
Have enough people around to share with.
And have enough moments to feel each other.
Sometimes it may be better to end a relationship.
Often you need to give more attention to the True Lover in you.